A Rake's (MP's) Progress

The Heir

Our MP is considering running for Parliament.

He has all the best intentions. Public service is a noble cause.

The Levee

Once elected our MP becomes increasingly popular, and enjoys the trappings of the high life.

The Orgy

Sadly our MP starts getting involved with

some bad eggs, and starts frequenting houses of ill repute. No, not the Commons and the Lords!

The Arrest

The Media start to pester our Hero MP after revelations are leaked concerning his private life. Apparently he charged to expenses a summer home for ducks, a second home (which in fact was his first home, but then to avoid CGT he switched) and some ladies of the night.

The Marriage

In an attempt to win back the hearts and minds of his constituency, our MP goes on a charm offensive, a high profile marriage to a z list celebrity. Sadly what works for Jordan and Anthea Turner in the pages of Heat and Okay, does not placate the public demanding their money back.

The cheeky MP claims that the public is just “jealous” of his fabulous life and wealth. He has a house that looks like Balmoral Castle, don’t you know.

The Gaming House

After being ordered, by his party leader, to pay back all the money he gained from his second home. Our MP, broke and his reputation in tatters, tries to win back his fortune at the casino and bookies.
A MP’s annual wage of £64,000 just is not enough to live off. These are hard times. Especially if a tin of dog food costs £4.50.

The Prison

Our MP walks a very well worn path from politics to prison. He is imprisoned for four years for perjury and perverting the course of justice, for a trial that was 12 years ago. What are the chances of that happening.

The Madhouse

Oh well, there is always the House of Lords…